This Week’s Biggest Gainers

1 Jay Cutler
The Bears quarterback signed a two-year contract extension worth $30 million.

2 BJ Armstrong
Governor Quinn named the retired Bull as his “Senior Adviser for Youth Outreach.”

3 Pat Quinn
No big surprise, but the governor announced his candidacy for the 2010 election.

4 Kirk Hinrich, Luol Deng, Lindsey Hunter
Meet your Bulls captains.

5 Billy Corgan
The Smashing Pumpkins leader has been getting some somewhat positive notices for his weirdo puppet show, “Gothageddon.”

This Week’s Biggest Losers

1 Lovie Smith
The Bears coach watched his team suffer an embarrassing weekend loss to the Bengals.

2 Tommie Harris
The Bears defensive lineman was not held out of Sunday’s game because of an injury—he was benched because of his questionable work ethic.

3 Robert J. Rassmussen, John Bowling
The two suburban men were arrested and charged for allegedly being involved in an offshore betting sports ring.

4 Mayor Daley
Continual fighting and even some more arrests at Fenger High doesn’t make anyone look good.

5 All Chicagoans
A survey by Harris Interactive found Chicago to be the most stressed-out city in the country. C’mon guys! Relax!