This Week’s Biggest Gainers
1
Barack Obama
Despite the resurfacing of the “Obama is Muslim” rumors, early voting in Chicago set records this week. We wonder who everyone was voting for.
2
Kyle Orton
A solid game against the Atlanta Falcons, which included a fourth-quarter scoring drive in the final seconds. So the Bears won, right? Of course not.
3
Rich Harden
The Cubs picked up the 2009 contract option for the starting pitcher, despite his wholly frightening arm troubles.
4
Martin Chalfie
The Chicago native was awarded part of the Nobel Prize in chemistry.
5
Chicago Bicyclists, Pedestrians, Rollerbladers and Skateboarders
Roads got a little safer when the city banned text-messaging while operating a motor vehicle.
This Week’s Biggest Losers
1
Milton Wardlaw
The Chicago man was charged with the murder of 17-year-old Kiyanna Salter.
2
Lovie Smith
The Bears coach watched his team gain a lead over the Atlanta Falcons with only eleven seconds remaining in the game—time with which the Falcons used to score a game-winning field goal.
3
Rod Blagojevich
It’s official, Rezko’s singing.
4
Mayor Daley
Took a popularity hit, to put it lightly, when he announced his plan to cut 240 jobs in an attempt to steady the city’s massive budget deficit.
5
Michael J. Beatz
The Joliet man was charged with a DUI and felony criminal damage after he rammed his car into his ex-girlfriend’s home when he caught sight of her new boyfriend. Real smooth, dude.
