By Rob Brezsny
ARIES (March 21-April 19): “There’s one ultimate goal during sex,” says Cosmopolitan magazine, a renowned source of erotic guidance for women. That is “to be as sensually stimulated as possible.” I don’t quite agree with that assessment. Having emotionally pleasing fun should also be an important consideration, as well as creating a playful ambiance and invoking spiritual grace. But sensual stimulation is good, too. So what, in the view of Cosmopolitan, is the key to cultivating maximum bliss? “Having lots of steamy info at your disposal.” That’s definitely sound advice for you right now, Aries. You’re in a favorable phase for finding out more about everything that will enhance your access to delight, including the sexual kind.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): When the tide is coming in, the creek I live next to flows vigorously toward the south. When the tide’s going out, the water reverses its course and heads swiftly north. Every day, there’s an in-between time when the creek seems confused. Some currents creep south and others slink north, while here and there eddies whirl in circles. According to my understanding of the astrological omens, Taurus, you are temporarily in a phase that resembles my creek’s time of contrary flows. It’s a perfectly natural place to be.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In fifth grade I was in love with Calley, who was by far the prettiest girl in the school. Sadly, she didn’t return my affection, so I had to be content with adoring her from afar. Eventually I moved away and lost touch. Since then I’ve wondered if she suffered the fate that befalls too many gorgeous women: relying so entirely on her looks to make her way in the world that she never developed many skills. But recently I tracked Calley down via Google and discovered that she had beaten the curse: She has carved out a career as an activist bringing first-rate education to poor children. My question to you is this, Gemini: Are there any qualities you regarded as assets earlier in your life but that eventually turned into liabilities? Any strengths that became weaknesses? And what are you doing to adjust? It’s a good time to address these themes.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Think back to the last half of 1998. What was going on in your life back then? According to my astrological projections, you were probably carrying out experiments in a wild frontier… or getting your mind rearranged by rousing teachings and provocative revelations… or breaking through artificial limits that had been quashing your freedom… or all of the above. Now you’ve come around again to a similar phase of your grand cycle. Are you ready for action? If you’d like to gather up all the grace flowing in your vicinity, start having fun with escapes, experiments and expansions.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “I wish I treated my feet with the same tender loving care as I do my face,” wrote Catherine Saint Louis in The New York Times. “But I don’t.” She quotes a study that says more than half of all women are embarrassed about their feet, and notes that Facebook has many “I Hate Feet” groups. You Leos can’t afford to be under this spell right now. Even more than usual, it’s crucial for you to be well-grounded. So I suggest you maneuver yourself into a state of mind where earthiness is beautiful and appealing to you. Find ways to celebrate your body and improve your relationship with it. How to start? Love your feet better.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): At this phase of my life, I’m not canvassing door-to-door asking people to donate money to save old-growth forests. I’m not a member of groups fighting for an end to the war in Afghanistan or agitating on behalf of animal rights. My struggle for social and environmental justice is waged primarily through the power of my writing. I subscribe to the attitude of author Ingrid Bengis, who said, “Words are a form of action, capable of influencing change.” In the coming weeks, I suggest you increase your awareness of how you could transform your world with the power of your language. Is it possible to increase your clout through the way you communicate?
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In the weeks ahead, Libra, you’re going to be tested on your follow-through. People will want you to work harder on what has previously come fairly easily. You will be pressured to make good on your promises; you’ll be asked to refine the details that are central to the success of the good new ideas that are floating around. As much as you might be tempted to slip away and fly off in pursuit of things that are more fun, I encourage you to stick with the program. You can’t imagine how important it is for you to learn how to be a more committed builder.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “If you’re strong enough there are no precedents,” said novelist F. Scott Fitzgerald. I think that describes you in the immediate future, Scorpio. I bet you won’t have to answer to ghosts or pay homage to the way things have always been done. You’ll be free to ignore icons that the conventional wisdom idolizes, and there’ll be no need for you to give undeserved respect to experts who have stopped being relevant. By my astrological reckoning, you will be so smart and plucky and energetic that you can work wonders simply by emptying your mind, starting from scratch, and making things up as you go along.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Scientists have discovered an exotic animal that feeds on the bones of dead whales lying on the ocean floor. Known informally as the bone-eating snot-flower worm, it looks like a frilly pink plume growing up out of sheer bone. Believe it or not, Sagittarius, you could take a cue from this creature in the coming weeks. It will be a favorable time for you to draw sustenance from the skeletal remains of big things that were once vital.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): What is the wild and instinctual nature? Radiance magazine posed that question to storyteller Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Here’s her reply: “to establish territory, to find one’s pack, to be in one’s body with certainty and pride regardless of the body’s gifts and limitations, to speak and act in one’s behalf, to be aware, alert, to draw on the innate feminine powers of intuition and sensing, to come into one’s cycles, to find what one belongs to.” I would love to see you specialize in these wild and instinctual arts in the coming weeks, Capricorn. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you are ready to tap into the deeper reserves of your animal intelligence. Your body is primed to make you very smart about what you need and how to get what you need.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): When I think of the extraordinary feats of strength you will be capable of in the coming weeks, my mind turns to a Chinese martial artist named Dong Changsheng. Last May, he attached one end of a rope to his eyelids and the other end to a small airplane, then pulled the thousand-pound load fifteen feet in a minute. I don’t think your demonstration of power will be as literal as his, and I suspect it will be more useful and meaningful. But in certain respects it could be just as amazing.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Scottish scientists decided to see if they could find evidence for the existence of the Loch Ness monster. They took a research submarine down into the murky depths, scanning with sonar. The prehistoric creature was nowhere in sight, but a surprising discovery emerged: Thousands of golf balls litter the bottom of the loch, presumably because the place has been used as an unofficial driving range for years. I predict that you will soon experience a reverse version of this sequence, Pisces: You will go in search of your personal equivalent of lost golf balls—some trivial treasure—but on the way you will have a brush with a living myth.
Homework: What kind of teacher do you need most? What is the ignorance that’s causing you to suffer? Write: Truthrooster@gmail.com.