By Rob Brezsny
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Interior designer Dorothy Draper said she wished there were a single word that meant “exciting, frightfully important, irreplaceable, deeply satisfying, basic and thrilling, all at once.” I wonder if such a word exists in the Chamicuro language spoken by a few Peruvians or the Sarsi tongue spoken by the Tsuu T’ina tribe in Alberta, Canada. In any case, I’m pleased to report that for the next few weeks, many of you Aries people will embody and express that rich blend of qualities. I have coined a new word to capture it: tremblissimo.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): According to my astrological intuition, you’re entering a phase when you will derive special benefit from these five observations by poet and filmmaker Jean Cocteau. 1. “There are truths that you can only say after having won the right to say them.” 2. “True realism consists in revealing the surprising things that habit keeps covered and prevents us from seeing.” 3. “What the public criticizes in you, cultivate. It is you.” 4. “You should always talk well about yourself! The word spreads around, and in the end, no one remembers where it started.” 5. “We shelter an angel within us. We must be the guardians of that angel.”
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Adolescence used to be defined as a phase that lasted from ages thirteen to nineteen. But scientists writing in the journal The Lancet say that in modern culture, the current span is from ages ten to twenty-four. Puberty comes earlier now, in part because of shifts in eating habits and exposure to endocrine-disrupting chemicals. At the same time, people hold onto their youth longer because they wait a while before diving into events associated with the initiation into adulthood, like getting married, finishing education, and having children. Even if you’re well past twenty-four, Gemini, I suggest you revisit and reignite your juvenile stage in the coming weeks. You need to reconnect with your wild innocence. You’ll benefit from immersing yourself in memories of coming of age. Be seventeen or eighteen again, but this time armed with all you have learned since.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Cancerian baseball pitcher Satchel Paige had a colorful career characterized by creative showmanship. On some occasions, he commanded his infielders to sit down and loll on the grass behind him, whereupon he struck out three batters in a row—ensuring no balls were hit to the spots vacated by his teammates. Paige’s success came in part because of his wide variety of tricky pitches, described by author Buck O’Neil as “the bat-dodger, the two-hump blooper, the four-day creeper, the dipsy-do, the Little Tom, the Long Tom, the bee ball, the wobbly ball, the hurry-up ball and the nothin’ ball.” I bring this to your attention, Cancerian, because now is an excellent time for you to amp up your charisma and use all your tricky pitches.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “Everyone tells a story about themselves inside their own head,” writes fantasy author Patrick Rothfuss. “Always. All the time. We build ourselves out of that story.” So what’s your story, Leo? The imminent future will be an excellent time to get clear about the dramatic narrative you weave. Be especially alert for demoralizing elements in your tale that may not in fact be true, and that therefore you should purge. I think you’ll be able to draw on extra willpower and creative flair if you make an effort to reframe the story you tell yourself so that it’s more accurate and uplifting.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In describing a man she fell in love with, author Elizabeth Gilbert wrote that he was both “catnip and kryptonite to me.” If you’ve spent time around cats, you understand that catnip can be irresistible to them. As for kryptonite: it’s the one substance that weakens the fictional superhero Superman. Is there anything in your life that resembles Gilbert’s paramour? A place or situation or activity or person that’s both catnip and kryptonite? I suspect you now have more ability than usual to neutralize its obsessive and debilitating effects on you. That could empower you to make a good decision about the relationship you’ll have with it in the future.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “I had to learn very early not to limit myself due to others’ limited imaginations,” testifies Libran astronaut Mae Jemison. She adds, “I have learned these days never to limit anyone else due to my own limited imagination.” Are those projects on your radar, Libra? I hope so. You now have extra power to resist being shrunk or hobbled by others’ images of you. You also have extra power to help your friends and loved ones grow and thrive as you expand your images of them.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The United States is the world’s top exporter of food. In second place is the Netherlands, which has 0.4 percent as much land as the United States. How do Dutch farmers accomplish this miraculous feat? In part because of their massive greenhouses, which occupy vast areas of non-urbanized space. Another key factor is their unprecedented productivity, which dovetails with a commitment to maximum sustainability. For instance, they produce twenty tons of potatoes per acre, compared with the global average of nine. And they do it using less water and pesticides. In my long-term outlook for you Scorpios, I see you as having a metaphorical similarity to Dutch farmers. During the next twelve months, you have the potential to make huge impacts with your focused and efficient efforts.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “The world is like a dropped pie most of the time,” writes author Elizabeth Gilbert. “Don’t kill yourself trying to put it back together. Just grab a fork and eat some of it off the floor. Then carry on.” From what I can tell about the state of your life, Sagittarius, the metaphorical pie has indeed fallen onto the metaphorical floor. But it hasn’t been there so long that it has spoiled. And the floor is fairly clean, so the pie won’t make you sick if you eat it. My advice is to sit down on the floor and eat as much as you want. Then carry on.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Novelist Anita Desai writes, “Isn’t it strange how life won’t flow, like a river, but moves in jumps, as if it were held back by locks that are opened now and then to let it jump forward in a kind of flood?” I bring this to your attention, Capricorn, because I suspect that the locks she refers to will soon open for you. Events may not exactly flow like a flood, but I’m guessing they will at least surge and billow and gush. That could turn out to be nerve-racking and strenuous, or else fun and interesting. Which way it goes will depend on your receptivity to transformation.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Miracles come to those who risk defeat in seeking them,” writes author Mark Helprin. “They come to those who have exhausted themselves completely in a struggle to accomplish the impossible.” Those descriptions could fit you well in the coming weeks, but with one caveat. You’ll have no need to take on the melodramatic, almost desperate mood Helprin seems to imply is essential. Just the opposite, in fact. Yes, risk defeat and be willing to exhaust yourself in the struggle to accomplish the impossible; but do so in a spirit of exuberance, motivated by the urge to play.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Never invoke the gods unless you really want them to appear,” warned author G. K. Chesterton. “It annoys them very much.” My teachers have offered me related advice. Don’t ask the gods to intervene, they say, until you have done all you can through your own efforts. Furthermore, don’t ask the gods for help unless you are prepared to accept their help if it’s different from what you thought it should be. I bring these considerations to your attention, Pisces, because you currently meet all these requirements. So I say go right ahead and seek the gods’ input and assistance.
Homework: What do you want to be when you grow up? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.